Monday, November 15, 2004

Warning: Ted Nugent Xing

Its officially deer hunting season and now its time for you would-be predators of the great wild to go out and kill a few hundred mammals. And thats just on the drive out to the camp.

I hate deer.. but, you probably know this by now. I don't know what the bag limit is on deer in this state, but I would love for it to be removed this year. Also I would love to see hunters go out and kill as many moose, wolves, mountain lions and bears as they wanted to. Moose because hitting one of them is even worse than hitting a deer. Hitting a moose will do one of two things. It will either go through the windshield of your car and plow through anyone sitting inside or it will bounce off your car, get up and start attacking your car until either you or your car are no longer moving. As for wolves, mountain lions and bears... these are critters we just don't need in the world. These are not cute and cuddly puppies, kitties and teddy bears. These are savage and dangerous inhabitants of our world. Upon meeting these creatures in the wild, they will most likely:
  1. Not care about how cute you think they are
  2. Not care about your stance on animal rights
  3. Track and run you down
  4. Kill you!
  5. Take you back to their den... in pieces if necessary
  6. Feed you to their young and then
  7. Defecate in your remains

These are not critters that need to be saved or cared for. They should be herded up and raised for either meat, bones and/or their fur. Either way, get them out of the wild. If we can knock down the ecology of the wilderness down to rabbit, fox and raccoon level, then we wouldn't have to worry about driving our cars to work without plowing into something too dumb to watch where its going and causing thousands of dollars to our vehicles. Let alone Boy Scouts that disappear on campouts.

Now go out and slaughter a few thousand critters this weekend. Wipe out a few PETAs or ALFs if they get in your way too.

1 comment:

Tamzilla said...

Deer suck, too bad they don't taste like beef.

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